EDIT; EMERGENCY EXIT!

its a funny thing, that no one thinks about.
but everything DOES happen for a reason in this place.
the meet
the greet
the lies
the cheats
the kisses
the fights
the battles
the losses
the deaths
the destruction
the messes
the break ups
the tears
the blood
the abusement.
EVERYTHING happens for a fucking reason.

JUST STAY AWAY FROM THE EMERGENCY EXIT.
because well, we're not quit done yet...

pages filled with ink

i want it to rain the hardest its ever rained just because all i feel like doing is listening to the perfect sound it makes against the metal onnings above the windows. i kind of want to sit on my porch and read a really good book that i never thought i would read because i thought the cover was ugly. i'm always the type of person that judges a book by its cover, and if the person/the book doesn't look like i would talk to them, i never actually will, unless they come up to me. i don't get it sometimes. i WANT to read, but i can never finish a book to save my life. i dont think i need a couneslour, but why can everyone else read but me? reading has like, seriously taken over the world. all you hear is shit like, "HAVE YOU SEEN THAT MOVIE?" or "HAVE YOU READ THAT BOOK?" and im always the one in the corner like, "no." i feel so stupid, and i feel like an alien sometimes. it's really stupid, but i need fucking help. I NEED TO READ A BOOK.

SOMEONE HELP ME!

freedom at last

i've FINALLY done my time.
and i can't tell any of you how glad i am now that that's all behind me.
i still have the punishment.
but im just glad i can stay downtown and be dirty with people i'm in love with.
i'm so happy that i'm not stupid anymore, and i finally realize what purpose i serve.
it's such a good feeling.

i can't even express the joy i'm feeling.
it's like, a milkshake just entered my veins,
i'm feeling the chills of being happy.
im feeling the colors of the sprinkles.
it's pickling my insides with smiley's.

and it's making my skin tight and happy.
i can finally smile again.
and it feels
SO
GOOD.

eternity.

is lost.
eternity is the blue thats in the sky,
the taste our coffee is in the morning,
the razor blade that cuts our skin.
eternity is the outlet i plug my lava lamp into.
its the eraser i use at the end of my chewed pencil.
its the never ending bliss of love.

eternity is the person you want to be with for the rest of your life.
its your most favoritest color.
its the taste of lips of the person you never want to stop kissing.
its your favorite candy.

eternity is a secret.
whisper it to your friends tomorrow.

it can be anything.
and i've found it. (:

lets live again

i wanna fuck around in the stupidest city of the world with some nonsense people that aren't even funny. i want to feel a feeling throughout my whole body that i've never felt before. all i want to see is my nose, and my bangs, because this shit is from MY prospective. things should be different when i feel this feeling. it needs to be OUT OF THIS WORLD. but i know it wont be. i need to lay in musty grass with an umbrella when it's not raining. i need to have a conversation that starts out in the a.m and ends in the p.m. do you know who you are? cause if you do come say hi. i hope it rains hard enough that i have to take my hoodie off from the lack of energy i have to carry it on my back because it's so drenched with douche bag mother nature. i want it to hail so hard, that it puts a permanant hole in my head. i want there to be a someone who walks in on me while im peeing in a public restroom. i want to look for someone, but i dont know what they look like. i want to be surrounded with thousands of people that aren't even looking at me, but i want just that one person to kidnap me, so i can fall in love with him. i want a preview of his face. but when he kidnaps me, i want him to have a bag over his head. i want him to be the most vibrant, crazy, psycho stranger in the history of strangers. i'm gonna stop being scared of what's gonna happen next, im gonna stop being so afraid of what people say to me and what tone they say it, im gonna stop being this huge pushover that i am, just so i can meet this one person that i've been dreaming about. i don't know who it is, and i don't know where they are, and I DON'T KNOW IF THEY'RE ALIVE OR ALIVE YET. i can't look at some fucked up off white photograph and tell you 'thats the person i've been dreaming of.' because well, i don't know who they are yet.

standing on T.V's

the time is going so slow.
boxes are full and so is my tummy.
plastic bags for picking up littler clutter the room.
paper is shredding in the background.
pink lipstick on my pillowcase, half on my face.
paper cuts cover my hands.
baskets full of dirty pants.
hoodies are damp from the rain, and so is my hair.
how can people miss this?
how can YOU miss this?

we're all living just to breath.
we're all breathing just to live.
we're all blinking so we can miss an awkward silence.

and we're all walking because we're nervous.
can you keep up?
are you ahead, or just a corpse straggling behind?
can you laugh without smiling?
can you kiss without your lipstick?

can we survive?
only time will tell.

bikes.

let's ride our bikes to somewhere worth going.
we will find our way, i promise.
there's beauty all around us, and the clouds will guide us.
it'll be our path.

there's beauty in this land,
it surrounds us.
pedal faster!
get away!
FASTER
FASTER

they're behind us for the rest of our lives.
let's ride our bikes to Australia.
and yes, over the seas too.
we only have $5.

but we have more than a hobo.
it'll get us through.
we can survive off of hoho's and zebracakes.
we can get energy off of each other's smiles.
because yours makes me wanna live forever.

dazzle me,
and i'll be sure to amaze you.