half empty next to nothing.

dirt and grime and clothes in the river and feet on the streets and you and me.
i know that it's nothing anymore, i know you're happy. i know i'm happy.
let's leave it at that
forgive and not forget. let's break a few rules
let's forget about the rule books
and forget about morals that were served to us on a silver platter.
yours was, mine weren't.
mine were served hands-free-under-the-table.
just like how i'm going to get paid.
let's compulsive lie; have them bounce in every corner of the ceiling
ever single quivering crevice of the doorknob.
twisting and turning like your face is distored.

the times were like a glass.
half empty of half full?
it's a trick question.

were "the times" an illusion?
or were they real?
did we actually live them?
or are they just washed away by waves like names in the sand.

i'm glad we're moving on.
i'm glad we forgot.
i'm glad YOU forgot.

it's like they never happened.
it's like
we're trying to be some alice in wonderland knock off.
just a dream
looking through a goddamn keyhole only to see yourself completely knocked out sleeping.

i would like to feel alive sometime too.
i AM alive.
I'M WALKING TALKING HUMAN FLESH THAT FUNCTIONS WITHOUT BEING GLUED TO THE PAST.
reality hasn't set in quite yet.
it hasn't made it way through my arms yet, it's stuck in a blood clot filled with tiny stress balls that are slowly starting to mend themselves away to nothing.
then reality will set in, under one condition.

when we did all this

were our veins half empty?
or half full?